Reading: A Story

I went through a period last year where I didn't read very much.  I think it was during the summer, when I was in the midst of my "What in the Wild Wild World of Sports did I get myself into?" phase.  This was highly unusual for me.  I don't go through many phases of not being interested in reading.  I have always loved books - from when I was a smallish boy.  I got it from my parents.  My dad read voraciously.  One of the most indelible images of my childhood was my dad laying in bed reading books until he fell asleep.  He had hundreds and hundreds of books in his room that he had devoured.  I'm not a big fan of all the stuff he read - but he loved reading.  My mom was similar.  I can distinctly remember her sitting in her chair by the window and front door, reading something and taking notes in it.  She had her own bookshelf down in the living room, stocks with books on theology and other Biblical study books.

I married a reader, too.  Heather tells me about how she used to get in trouble for reading too late in her room.  She reads faster than I do - a great quality for a Med Student.  Her mom has a huge bookcase full of her various interests.  Heather's grandparents always were reading - as are her brothers.  And our kids are following in our footsteps.  Even our little guy, Gabe, now has gotten hooked on books.  Every night, we have to read him Go Dogs Go and Whose Nose and Toes.

All of that is to say that I don't remember a time when I avoided reading.  At some point, though, my older self took back over my big stupid self and I went on a reading tear that was unlike anything that I can remember doing in my past.  I began to notice this.  And, being the enormous wonk that I am, I decided to start tracking my book consumption.  (I'm a nerd.  This is news to you people?!?)  Here's what it looked like when the year was over.

• In February and March, I read The Watchmen by Alan Moore at 416 pages, Tuck by Stephen Lawhead at 464 pages, and Hooked by McIlhaney & Bush at 178 pages.  Then it came to a screeching halt.
• I didn't read anything until at least July.  That was when I started reading some books at Heather's parents' house - John Grisham in particular.  I guess it kick started things.  Starting in July, here is what happened.
• Anger by Gary Chapman - 242 pages
• The Associate by Grisham - 284 pages
• Bleachers by Grisham - 192 pages
• The Street Lawyer by Grisham - 384 pages
• The Partner by Grisham - 416 pages
• The Testament by Grisham - 480 pages
• The Summons by Grisham - 304 pages (I was reading these Grisham books in one and two days - just flying through them.)
• Samson and the Pirate Monks by Nate Larkin - 224 pages
• The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown - 528 pages
• The Jesus You Can't Ignore by John MacArthur - 256 pages
• The Book of Basketball by Bill Simmons - 736 pages (yeah - like an encyclopedia - took me three weeks to slog through it)
• Harry Potter Saga (seven books) by JK Rowling - 4324 pages (took three weeks to read all of it)
• Psych Books: Mind over Magic by William Rabkin - 288 pages (based on the USA series)

The grand total for the year was over 9600 pages.  I know that I probably forgot something here or there, so I'm guessing I actually was up over 10,000 pages.  I don't know what I had read in years past, but I don't know if I ever had touched that total.  Well, this year I swore I would continue the process and keep reading.  So far, after almost eight months, here is where I am this year.

• The Alchemyst by Michael Scott - 400 pages
• Crazy Love by Francis Chan - 192 pages
• Other Small Harry Potter Books by JK Rowling - 216 pages total
• Another Stupid Psych Book - 284 pages
• Percy Jackson Series (five books) by Rick Riordan - 1824 pages total
• Game Change by John Hellemann - 464 pages
• How to Train Your Dragon 1 & 2 by Cressida Cowell - 480 pages
• Artemis Fowl Series (six books) by Eion Colfer  - 1700 pages
• Circle Series (four books) by Ted Dekker - 1551 pages
• Peter and the Starcatchers by Dave Barry - 451 pages
• The Rise and Fall of Darth Vader by Ryder Windham - 224 pages
• Red Pyramid by Rick Riordan - 528 pages
• The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo  by Stieg Larsson - 644 pages
• Against Medical Advice by James Patterson - 284 pages

I've already read 9500 pages this year.  And I already have the second Stieg Larsson book waiting.  Plus I've started several other books that are ones I pick up, read a few chapters, and lay back down.  That means that in the last thirteen months, I have read about 18,000 pages!  That's is a lot!  After all of that, here are a few observations that I have come up with - about myself and books in general.

• Some of you have probably noticed there are not a lot of "Christian" books on that list.  It used to be that all my reading was in the "Christian Living" or "Christian Topics" sections of the bookstore.  In this last explosion of books, I can see nine that would even be sold in a Lifeway Store.  I have tried to figure out what happened with all of that, even talking to my good buddy David Tarkington - pastor at First Baptist Orange Park - to see what he thought.  I think part of it is that I am not in church work now.  So I don't have a desire to read a bunch of books on that, like I used to when I worked for the church.  Second, I often will read books that have something to do with Defender Ministries, but those rarely are "Christian" books.  There aren't a ton of "Christian" books out there that deal with the stuff we work with.  When a good one comes along (like Samson and the Pirate Monks) I read it.
• Furthermore, I have kind of gotten a little tired of a lot of the "Christian" titles out there - at least the approach that I have begun to see take root in the Christian publishing world.  A lot of books seem like they were generated by a sermon series.  That series is then turned into a book.  I know this happens all the time because big famous Christian authors do it (Stanley, Swindoll, and MacArthur - to name a few).  Also I talked to a pastor before about doing that very thing with his sermons.  The problem is, a lot of times that is enough information to generate about two-thirds of a book.  So you kind of figure out where everything is going and there just seems to be a lot of fluff and repetition to fill up a full sized book.  Then it is just fluffy and repetitive.  Very much repeating and fluff.  See how annoying that is?  I still keep my eyes open for good books in that realm.  But I probably should be in there a bit more.
• "Young Readers" literature is fun to read.  So far, I have tackled part of all of seven different series that would be classified as "children's books."  Let me be perfectly honest - they are just as well written as John Grisham books and just as challenging.  I found it humorous that he actually put out a book in this genre this year.  It would basically be a normal John Grisham book, but probably with less cursing and adult situations.  They are far better than stuff like the Psych books I wasted my time reading.  They are usually fast paced, interesting, and don't have a lot of the language, violence, and sex that so many books struggle with.  And some of them, like the Harry Potter series, are far better than the vast majority of literature out there.
• Non-fiction books can be just as exciting as fiction.  I always steered away from non-fiction books.  Maybe it was the bad memories of my college years when I had to read countless volumes of those type of books.  I don't know.  But I also avoided documentary films.  Lately, though, I have found that I have thoroughly enjoyed numerous non-fiction tomes.  The Book of Basketball by Bill Simmons was immensely fascinating - even though it was a beast to work through.  The book Game Change, about the last Presidential election, was even better than most thrillers.  I couldn't put it down.  And I blew the heart-rending Against Medical Advice by James Patterson today.  It was about a boy who battled OCD, Tourettes, and Anxiety Disorder and how his family struggled to find a cure.  Gripping and fast paced.
• The latest "big reputation" novel I finished was The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.  It was brilliantly written, very intelligent, and hard to put down.  It also was very hard to stomach.  It dealt with the hunt for a murderer and dealt with issues of rape, abuse, and incest.  There were scenes that made me want to put the book away for good.  The book was just too good to abandon.  The other thing that kept me going was that the author interspersed the story with stats about how common those things are in Sweden (where he is from and the book is set).  It is truly heartbreaking that evil of that sort exists - especially on that scope.  But the book itself was just an amazingly crafted work.
• One of things that I am learning through all of this reading is how to be a better storyteller.  This is something that I see in myself - the ability and desire to communicate stories about life, God, the world.  I think it is a noble calling that has existed as long as man has.  I love writing, teaching communicating messages through graphic work.  I also want to write books.  I have several started, but need to work harder on them.  Over the last twelve months I basically have been in a crash course with some of the best authors in the business.  JK Rowling, John Grisham, James Patterson, Stieg Larsson, Bill Simmons, Ted Dekker, Dave Barry.  I have seen how they craft stories that enthrall.  And they also can sustain a long term series of books.  I feel I have actually grown as a writer by reading these other writers.  It is almost like I have been in school.  

That all being said, there may be some changes in my blogs.  I have been thinking about the direction I want to take both this blog and the Darth Fatso site.  The other day, I looked into WordPress.  They have a better way of organizing blogs - where I could host both under one roof.  I am still thinking about what all I want to do, but that may be something that happens sooner rather than later.  I, of course, will let you know.  Just keep reading.

A Decade in Review

Well, I certainly have not been a very faithful blogger over the Christmas holidays. Ever since Heather entered her break from school, I have not had the itch to write on ye olde blogge as much. I'm not sure why. I pretty much put all my planned topics on hold for the month of December and just enjoyed hanging out with the family. We spent a couple of weeks in Jacksonville, which encompassed Heather's birthday and Natalie's birthday and Christmas. Then we went to South Carolina for New Year's to be with Heather's brothers and their families. It was a nice holiday season.

So what have I been doing lately? Well, aside from those holiday and birthday celebrations, I have been reading a lot. And I certainly mean A LOT! I counted it up the other day and realized that in the last two months, I have read well over 5,000 pages worth of books. That doesn't count blogs or magazines or newspapers. (A free Chocolate Orange candy to the first person who can name 10 of the books that helped make up the 5,000 figure.) It is pretty funny that someone earlier this year told me they thought I wasn't reading as much. That was when I read half of the John Grisham collection in two weeks. In the month of December, I read at least 3500 pages. I guess it all goes in spurts.

I also have been freezing my rear end off. This has been a weird winter thus far. I have spent winters in south Florida, central Florida, west Florida, northeast Florida, and now northwest Florida. Each of them were very different. This one is the coldest, but I am not sure that is fair, since this is a record cold snap. My friend Greg up here told me this is the coldest it has been in his twelve years here. There even was a brief bit where the Weather Channel was predicting snow here on Friday. Then they all had a good laugh and changed it. The low for that night still is supposed to be 19. Wha? We just experienced insane cold up in South Carolina with a record low of 14. It is weird when temperatures could be football scores. (South Carolina 19, Florida 24) I'm used to them being basketball scores. (Orlando 85, Charlotte 79)

I'm not complaining - I like the cooler weather. It is a nice break from being cooked to medium rare going to check the mail. There are two things I'm not too fond of with the colder weather. The first is the asthma. Our kids all battle asthma to varying degrees. Josiah had a full attack the other night in SC - turning blue and everything. The dry heat in the house triggered it. All three kids have been coughing more since we have to run the heat so much. Now I know why people are told to move to Florida and Arizona when they have respiratory issues. The other thing I don't like is the bundling up process. You get the kids all dressed. They have long shirts and pants - sometimes two shirts. Then you have to put on the jackets and such - to walk fifty feet to the car. Then they want to take it all off. Then you put it on to walk from the parking lot to Publix. Then you take the jackets off. Then back on . . . and off . . . . and on . . . and off. I think that alone would drive me crazy if I lived up north. The cold I can handle. It is what to do with my jacket that pushes me over the edge.

So to the true point of my post. Apparently we have entered a new decade and a new year. At least that is what I figured from all the weight loss ads and promotions I have seen lately. I decided to forgo my yearly recap, where I use my limited exposure to the world at large to make ridiculous rankings. Instead, I will use that limited exposure to my benefit, and recap the decade that just waved adios. It was a big decade for me - the Aughts. I was thinking about that the other day. What a huge difference ten years makes. I honestly don't know if I could top this decade. So, here's my self indulgent recap of 2000-2009. You may think it is stupid. But, honestly, would that be a first for this blog? If you aren't happy, send your comments and insults to my new secretary: Myrtle McIntosh, 2506 Lilly Pond Way, Sharkfart, TX, 76067.

2000: What a crazy year! I got engaged in February to Heather. In June, I had the awesome experience of going to Sydney, Australia for three weeks to help run sports camps at a church there. August 12 it rained. It also was our wedding day. We went to Vermont for our honeymoon and got to see where my dad was born and grew up (and is buried). I quit my job at FBC Temple Terrace in December; and we found out we were expecting Josiah two days later. All of that collided with Christmas in Georgia, Heather's brother getting married (which was my first wedding ceremony to officiate), and the first time I saw snow. Wow.

2001: I started off the year unemployed and expecting a child. YAY! Heather withdrew from USF. We moved to Orange Park. I worked as a substitute teacher for a few months. Then I became a furniture salesman at Rhodes Furniture. In September, we welcomed our first child into the world on the day the world officially went crazy. We all tried to understand what to do with the fall of the Twin Towers, the anthrax attacks, the new war in Afghanistan. I personally withdrew as far away from God as I ever have been. And I got a Palm Handspring for Christmas.

2002: After seventeen months of seeking more gainful employment, I was hired in May by First Baptist Church of Oviedo. That meant a move down to Orlando for my little family. It was a very challenging job, but very rewarding - and it has led to so much more than I could imagine for all of us. Heather returned to school in the Fall, this time getting her priorities straight and becoming a UCF Knight. And in a wacky turn of events, my mom moved up to Orlando late in 2002 - something I never would have expected.

2003: Another year of surprises. The Tampa Bay Bucs won the Super Bowl. I was thrilled. We went up to South Carolina for Spring Break. While there, we found out Heather was pregnant as she was going through a miscarriage. Less than a month later, we were stunned again as we found out that Heather was pregnant again, which led to another break in school for Heather. I got begin a friendship with Charles Wise at the church - which played a very important role in our lives. I started working as the layout person and editor for a Christian newspaper. Natalie showed up at Christmas - just as her name (which we had chosen back in 1999) indicates. [Natalie means "Christmas child."] We moved out of our scary apartment into a rental home, and we hosted Christmas at our house.

2004: We now became the Staples Family 4. Things went along pretty normally for a while. I began to hate the Bucs, due to their shady dealings. My mom moved to Tampa to be closer to my sister, Holly. I turned 30 and finally got a watch that fit my needs - never needing a battery (still running perfectly). Heather went back to school in the Fall. Josiah also went to school for the first time as he went to the 2 year old class at our church's preschool. My last grandparent passed away in September. She had lived long enough to see her first great-granddaughter, though. Heather turned 25 in December. I threw her an awesome party with London Broil and a big strawberry shaped cake. (You can tell it was a slow year.)

2005: In March, my prayer for a ministry to work in was answered as Charles Wise, Jonathan Pearson, and myself founded Defender Ministries. I was able to design all sorts of products and basically create the look of the ministry. By the end of the year, I had written several rounds of curriculum. Heather ramped up her school work to prepare for Med School - which we had decided was what she would aim for. (Well, I finally agreed that it was the right thing. Heather had known for years and was patiently waiting for me to get my head out of my rear end.) I got to experience the spectacle that is Las Vegas in July at a design conference - which came with the important lesson that if you are broke, alone, and not prone to drinking or carousing, Vegas is very boring place. We moved to a different rental house that Fall, even farther away from anywhere we needed to be.

2006: Lots of movement in StaplesLand. I saw my first real blizzard in February as I went up to Montreal to plan a mission trip for the church. It was 9 degrees! That's a baseball score! Defender was picking up steam - as we were able to teach sessions at various conferences. I quit my job at the church in July to go full time with Defender (although I still did all the graphics for the church for another four months). We got a new Honda Odyssey. Natalie started preschool. Heather finally was able to graduate in December from UCF. All was right with the world. Our kids were potty trained and weaned. We decided that our family was complete. So Heather and I booked a cruise for January 2007.

2007: Heather and I went on our first cruise ever. We got to see Key West and Mexico. It was awesome. And our little cruise souvenir was discovered - as Gabe decided to crash the Staples party. We began to attend Waypoint Church in Orlando - where we made some wonderful deep friendships. I took over the college ministry in early summer. Defender continued to do its thing - speaking engagements, lesson writing, looking for supporters to help hit the next level. Heather began studying in earnest for the MCAT (Med School Entrance Exam). My sister had her son, Toby - making me an uncle for the first time. Josiah started Kindergarten. We moved yet again to a home closer to our circle of friends. Gabe arrived in September.

2008: Heather took her MCAT in March and nailed a 30 on it - exactly where she needed to be (while having a newborn seemingly permanently attached to her). I had to find some other jobs to help cover costs. I began to work at the Apple store in August. (YAY!) I also began teaching at International Community School (DOUBLE YAY!) Josiah entered public school in August, but it was a huge disaster. We ended up pulling him out and enrolling him at ICS - which was a huge success. We really seemed to be hitting our stride. The kids were doing well in school. I had four great jobs that I loved. Heather was applying to Med Schools, but we really wanted to get into UCF's new school. We moved again (common theme, I know) to an apartment. And the year ended with all of us pretty happy and excited about the new year.

2009: Heather got accepted at FSU's Med School, which meant all of us were moving to Tallahassee. Gabe got to see snow in February and was not impressed. The other two kids got ticked at this, since they were trapped in Orlando with me. Heather's brother Andy and his wife Michelle had their first child, Beulah, in April. She was a miracle baby - I am fully convinced. We moved in May, which is when Heather started classes. In July, Heather's grandfather passed away, which was very hard on all of us. Natalie started Kindergarten, and we decided to homeschool the kids. It was a huge disaster. So we ended up enrolling them at Apalachee Elementary, which has been a huge success. Heather, of course, did an amazing job in Med School. And I settled into my new role as stay-at-home dad. Heather turned 30 in December. And we got iPhones.

It was an eventful decade to say the least. I started it single, 25, living in Tampa, running a college ministry, and going to seminary. I ended it married, 35, with three kids, living in Tallahassee, running my own ministry, staying at home with a wife becoming a doctor. 2000 found me rooting for the Bucs and the Yankees, hating the NBA. UCF was, of course, number one. 2010 finds me having ditched the disloyal Bucs for the Jags, given up on baseball, and rediscovered the NBA and the Magic. UCF is, as always, the most important sports entity to me - but now they have their own stadium. In 2000, I hated Macs. In 2010, I own nothing but Macs and Apple stuff. A lot happens in ten years. It is important to look back sometimes at how far you have come. It helps to remind you of what was really important. It shows me how minor events end up being big deals down the road. And I see how God is with me all the way. I hope that you had some time between the presents and getting back to work to think about those things in your life. And I hope I didn't bore you too much with my reminiscing. If I did, Myrtle is waiting for your letters. Make her earn her paycheck.

Doubting David

It is hard admitting negative things about ourselves.  Sure, there are those of us who are what people call "self deprecating."  I joke that way a lot - especially about my weight and my melancholy nature.  But, honestly, it is not like people didn't know those things already.  Anyone who looks at me knows that I am "husky."  And if you hang out with me long enough, you too will join the throngs that have echoed something along the line of "You can be pretty negative."  I fight both of those things, but they still hang around like unwanted houseguests.  So my acknowledging those things are just accepting reality.  It would seem pretty silly for me to go around bragging about my shape, when my own four year old can - and frequently does - point out that "Daddy is fat because he has a HUUUUGE tummy."  

I mean that it is hard to admit negative things that are more hidden.  I remember that a few years ago, after reading Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller, that I had to take a very hard look at myself.  I documented it in this award winning post.  I uncovered some very unpleasant things about who I truly was.  And I have worked - to varying degrees of success - to fix those ugly character traits.  This morning, I had a similar experience - with a very disturbing and shocking discovery.  I was reading With Christ in the School of Prayer by Andrew Murray.  Chapter Eleven to be precise.  I've read this book before, but my business partner Charles has been reading it all year (time and time again) and so I decided to read it again.  

[Small Note Here:  I firmly believe in the theory that the great Dr. Eddie Gilley taught me waaay back in '96.  "The only two things that will change who you are after the age of 18 are the books you read and the people you hang around."  Some try to challenge that by saying, "What about God?"  My answer is, "Well that's who you hang around, and the Bible is what you read."  Anyway, I push books on everyone because they can and will change you.  That is why so many of these self-discovery posts begin with "I was reading..."]

This chapter was covering the Biblical passage of Matthew 21 (parallel passage in Mark 11 and similar theme in Matthew 17), where Jesus says that if you have faith, you could cast a mountain into the sea.  I've heard this before many times.  I appreciate the verse and how it points out the importance of faith.  I've never been able to cast a mountain into the sea.  So, either I don't have enough faith or this is a figurative statement or there hasn't been a good reason to pray that.  Not sure.  Anyway, Murray went on about this promise and how it is an amazing promise that God gave us and that many people don't really have faith in the promise - since it is so extreme.  And then he made this point.  It isn't really just a lack of faith in the promise - is it really a lack of faith in the PERSON who MADE the promise.

I sat there at first, nodding and thinking about that.  I have a decent level of faith.  I've proven that over the years, by stepping out numerous times and trusting God.  Our daughter's middle name is Faith - which we chose to illustrate the importance of faith.  I kept reading the chapter, and then I started praying after that.  As I did, I began to realize the truth.  If you read my post yesterday about being weary, you know that I am wrestling with a lot of stuff right now.  And I am trying to say all the right things, and do all the right things.  But when I sat there this morning in that room by myself, I realized that I couldn't keep lying to myself or to God.  Right now, I don't trust Him.

That is what is hard to admit.  And I know that quickly all the people around me would either try to talk me out of that statement ("You do trust Him, you are just having a bad stretch.") or they would try to lecture me on how dangerous that is to say ("You had better fix that before it becomes a big problem.").  But it is true.  Right now, I don't trust Him to answer my prayers.  I have lots of reasons why.  I have had too many prayers that were not answered (our way of saying He said no.)  And they were good prayers that were about good things - like paying bills or getting a job or whatever.  I have waited too long for answers.  I have seen too many things that seemed like answers get ripped away - too many jobs that fell through, too many supporters who backed out, too many times that nothing changed.  

As these all built up, I began to just assume that the answer would be no.  I prepare myself that way.  I assume the job won't work out.  I assume no donations will come in the mailbox.  That makes the disappointment less when that is the case.  This is actually a big lie.  The disappointment is still just as bad, but there was no place of hope before hand that was dashed.  We as American Christians have such a screwed up version of prayer.  We tack on this "if it is your will" to everything - even though we don't care what HIS will is, unless it matches our will.  But we put that on there so it sounds right, and insulates us against the pain of a negative response.  "I guess it wasn't His will."  But it was OUR desire, and that hurts.  We don't pray boldly because we don't want to "back God in a corner."  But everything that is taught about prayer in the Bible involves big, audacious, faith expanding prayers.  They are fleece wetting, giant killing, wall tumbling, sea parting, mountain casting, water walking prayers.  We don't pray those.  We pray sissy prayers - and get so upset about those that we can't move past it.

The Bible is full of stories where prayers are answered in amazing ways - and relatively few where they aren't.  But our lives are the opposite.  I know that is true in my case.  I see so many prayers that I offer that come crashing down.  So, who do I blame?  God, of course.  He said no.  I ignore the first part of that verse in Matthew 17 - "If you have the faith of a mustard seed."  In Matthew 21 and Mark 11, the phrase is "If you have faith, and DO NOT DOUBT."  Whose fault is it, then?  Yes there are times when God says no - and He always has a reason for that.  But it seems that much of the reason our prayers are not answered is that we don't trust God can or will answer.  Last week, I read a passage in Oswald Chambers' classic My Utmost for His Highest.  He said that so many times we think that a little doubt it natural.  It is just us being smart enough, logical enough to know that we won't always hear yes.  But he said that any amount of doubt is sin - even a small amount.  It is questioning God's character, His Word, His nature, His promises, His power.  And, according to Jesus Himself, doubt is enough to derail our prayers - both big and small.

It is unpleasant for me to have to admit that about myself.  I take pride in my faith (probably too much, actually).  But, in reality, I have very little faith.  In reality, I doubt God all the time.  I don't believe He will follow through.  Even as I am praying the big prayers, hoping for the impossible to happen, I reserve a little bit of doubt just to protect myself.  But, for all I know, that could be what is keeping me from seeing victory.  That little protection is actually a poison - a destructive element that is killing me.  That is tough pill to swallow.  And it is a tough thing to say out loud.  I don't want that to be my legacy - doubting.  I want to see victories and amazing things done through God's hands.  I want to be a part of deliverance and rescue.  Am I willing to lose all of that to try to protect my feelings?  I guess that's the question I have to answer.

WESLEYAN GENERAL ASSEMBLY: Event Thoughts

Sorry that I was not able to keep up with the Wesleyan blogging like I hoped. There was no WIFI at the exhibit hall, so any updates had to be done on my phone, hitting those little tiny keys with my thumbnails. And the battery was not designed for stuff like that. Plus there wasn't all THAT much going on to justify constant updates. And I was tired. And my back hurt. Mah mah, wah wah.

So I decided to just put my thoughts down about the event. Lots of the exhibitors felt let down at the way the hall was set up. There was not a constant flow of traffic, and the people coming through were not people who would be hiring architects or starting capital stewardship campaigns. Personally, I wasn't to upset. It gave me a chance to actually chat with each person. That helped me to explain things better without feeling rushed.

I also got to spend a lot of time talking to my fellow vendors. This included the trio from churchwebworks.com - who have some great web hosting and creation deals. And I got to chat with Mark Kelly from Heritage Foundation. He was really cool. I also got to wander around and meet the representatives from several Wesleyan colleges - who were excited about possibly having Defender come to their campuses.

The best part, though, was getting to talk with the various people who knew Heather's family. Heather's grandparents - John and Eva Blann - served for many many years within the Pilgrim Holiness, and subsequent Wesleyan church. They were missionaries to Africa. They served in churches with John as a pastor. And he also served at the Frankfort Wesleyan Bible College as President. Their daughter, Lois, is my mother-in-law. On Heather's dad's side, her uncle Dr. Dave Babb is on staff with the Wesleyans in the Penn-Jersey District. And that family has been very active in the church.

So, I would talk to various people, and most of them knew at least one of those people. Some knew all of them. One couple had served in Africa with the Blanns. Another remembered babysitting Lois, and were good friends with Uncle Dave. The thing that I noticed is that everyone who knew the Blanns, Babbs, or Crissingers thought so highly of them. They raved about how wonderful they were and the impact they had. It was such an honor to be a part of that family - and representing them in some way. I have never ever been treated as an outsider by my in-laws. From the very outset, I became part of the family and was treated just like a blood relative. They love me, defend me, support me. Uncle Dave was beating the Defender drum to anyone he could. The Blanns - even in their late 80s - cried when I first told them we were starting the ministry because they knew how many people needed to be rescued from the sins we address. And to see how much these families have done through the years serving God was awesome.

The conference as a whole had a wonderful feeling to it. There was love all around. People would reconnect there - look for old pastors or fellow missionaries. They would share stories. There is a genuine love for missions - and missionaries play a vital role in the conference. In fact, most of the older ministers served at some point overseas. Since so many went to the Wesleyan colleges, there is a camaraderie there between alumni. And there is an acceptance of other races - I noticed a large number of African-American pastors and leadership. It was so nice to be there.

It gave me pause when I contrasted it to the Baptist conferences I have been to. I don't want to bash my own denomination. But honestly, I never felt anything like this at anything they have put on. There is a lot of comparisons being tossed around. Who has the biggest budget, best building, biggest attendance, largest membership. It sounds like a high school locker room. There isn't love. There isn't a respect for the elder generation. They are seen as "out of touch" and shoved out as soon as possible. The big shots with the new hot schemes are embraced. But the younger generation - unless they are homegrown superstars with the right name or right assignment - are given the whole "shut up until you pay your dues" treatment. Missions almost exists strictly to satiate some guilt for not wanting to reach out past their own walls. And most of the business done is arguing over petty rules, finding new ways to get the rest of the world rankled, and bloviating over useless points of contention.

I actually was embarrassed and a little upset at the difference. Sure, this post will in and of itself tick off some of my fellow Baptists. They will immediately attack the Wesleyans for their differences in theology (which I am well aware of - having spent eight years living very close to several of their ministers). They will call them liberal and accuse me of selling out. Which kind of goes to prove my point. It was very interesting. I was reading John MacArthur's book The Tale of Two Sons while I was sitting for hours. It was very good. At one point, I was sitting there laughing to myself about the contradictions going on in my booth - a Baptist reading a book written by a Calvinist at a Wesleyan conference. The lessons of the book - about how Jesus was targeting the Pharisees yet again with the story, calling out their hypocrisy and obsessive commitment to useless man-made traditions and rules - really resonated with me this week. I realized how sometimes I am that hypocrite. Sometimes I judge like the older brother. And sometimes I join my denomination in finger pointing and accusing, refusing to go into the party like the older sibling to prove a point. I also thought about how blessed I was to be a part of something so sweet as the Wesleyan celebration. Whatever worries I had slipped away as minister after minster shook my hand and thanked me for doing what I was doing. Person after person said they would pray for us, or wanted to use us -- in numbers unlike anything in my own group of churches. And while I am not going to disavow my church membership or switch places of worship, for those five days I was more than happy, and quite honored, to be invited to their fellowship. In fact, even with the 13 hour days, I was a bit sad to have to leave. I look forward to working with them again.

KING SIZED BLOGS 2006 Year in Review: Sports 2 & Books

Greg once again did a great job on his sports comments. But I am confused. How can a dyed in the wool, bleeding garnet and gold FSU fan cheer for Florida tonight? You can check out the travesty of Greg's comments here. I know that whoever wins tonight will win the title. Which is why, as much as I cannot stand Jim Tressell and Ohio State, I am cheering for them. Why? Because I don't want to listen to Florida fans bragging about how awesome they are. Gator fans are THE MOST annoying fans in college football. Even if they lose, they will spend the next year trying to convince everyone why they were robbed. So, we have to hear them yap anyway, but at least they will be miserable. As for Ohio State, Tressell is like the second coming of Saint Bobby Bowden - the loveable coach how somehow knows nothing going on with his players. If there are any more Ohio State player incidents, they will have to require their players to all purue the same degree for them to choose: Bachelors of Science in Criminal Science (with practicum)

Also, yesterday something happened in the sports world that reminded me of something I forgot to include. I absolutely cannot stand when college football (or basketball) coaches pull this "I am not going anywhere" stuff. The latest was Bobby Petrino of Louisville. Here's his stats. In his four years at Louisville, Petrino went 9-4, 11-1, 9-3, and 12-1. He had two bowl wins, including this year's Orange Bowl with its big fat BCS payout. And in four years, he had TWO contract extensions and/or raises. The latest was signed this LAST AUGUST for 10 years and $25 million. This was accompanied by the standard "I am in Louisville for the long haul." So now, he is the coach of the Atlanta Falcons, with a 5 year, $24 million contract.

Now, if Louisville was to want to get rid of Petrino, they would have had to BUY OUT his contract. So, even if he pulled a George O'Leary and his team went into the toilet, they would still have to pay him $22.5 million (unless they could negotiate a different set of terms). They couldn't cut his salary to reflect his poor performance. But, Petrino (and his ilk - Nick Saban, Pete Carroll, Charlie Weis, Kirk Ferentz) will use the vultures of the NFL as reason to demand raises and extensions. So, what does Louisville get for Petrino breaking his word? Well, the normal stipulation is a buyout clause - where the coach is on the hook for some figure (in Petrino's case, probably $5-8 million). But he won't pay that. Arthur Blank, owner of Atlanta will. So, Petrino got extra money each year, KNOWING that he was going to screw Louisville as soon as he could.

Instead of Louisville going for the national championship next year, their top juniors (Brohm, Bush) will bolt for the NFL. And the college will have to go raid some other school (probably Tulsa) for their coach. And the dominoes continue. This is why teams like USF have put enormouse buyout clauses into their coach's contract - just so they get SOMETHING back for getting the shaft. And after Mike Vick won't listen to Petrino, and gets all uppity, and the Falcons have another couple of last season explosions, Petrino will get fired, get the money left in his deal, and then go back to college and coach someone like Cal when their coach bolts.

That is why I admire guys like Joe Paterno and Bobby Bowden and Coach K - they have had other chances over the years. But they would rather stay for the long term and build a legacy instead of build a bank account. And don't feel bad for them, they make plenty of money. Paterno has made so much over the years that he is one of the biggest donors to the school. The modern coach just sees their job as a stepping stone and resume builder. Look at the list. Urban Meyer shafted Bowling Green AND Utah before coming to Florida. And don't think he won't do the same thing to the Gators after another couple seasons when the Houston Texans or Cleveland Browns or Tampa Bay Bucs come calling. Nick Saban has screwed over Michigan State, LSU, and the Miami Dolphins. And there are many more - we probably will see several this year. It just makes me angry. Even George O'Leary pulled this at UCF. He rode the wave of excitement over UCF's first bowl game and scored a 10 year extension. He promptly followed that up with a stunning 4-8 season. My only hope is that the Falcons and Petrino get exactly what they deserve - each other.

As for my 2006 Best Books, I have not read like I normally do this year. There has been so much going on in my life that reading has gotten pushed out. I am tried to rectify this now - I'm reading a few different books now and have others on deck. Since I am pretty careful about what I read, I don't have a lot of disappointing books - although I do have one this year. So, here is the unabridged book review.

MOST ENJOYABLE BOOKS:
Pornified by Pamela Paul: Well, I don't think I can call this ENJOYABLE. But it was the best book I read this year. It was extremely enlightening. It also gave Defender Ministries (my company) some real ammo in its battle to equip people struggling with internet pornography. The book examines the "pornification of America." It has stats, stories, and info about how heavy use of this stuff severely affects people. It is also not a book for the weak of heart or easily offended. It was not a Christian book, but I think every pastor should read it. It is just that important to see what is going on. Plus, Pamela Paul seems really cool. I wrote her to tell her how much the book meant to us, and she actually wrote back to encourage us to do well. She loved our ministry and helped us get some breaks on book purchases. Can't beat that.
Hood by Stephen Lawhead: I read one of Lawhead's series before, but that was it. This is a retelling of the Robin Hood saga, except with the characters and settings reflected in England after the Norman Conquest of 1066. He even argues in the postlogue how he feels that is entirely possible. Absolutely engrossing book. It was the best book of fiction I have read in years. Of course, now I have to wait for the other two books of the trilogy. Dang.
Prayer by Phillip Yancey: I don't think I can have a year end review of books without a Yancey book on it. This may be his most personal book yet - really looking at the hard questions about prayer. No matter what he writes, Yancey always makes you think. And you are usually better for that examination.
The Shepherd, The Angel, and Walter the Christmas Miracle Dog by Dave Barry: I read the book in about an hour. It was short, fast paced, nostalgic, and hillarious. I haven't laughed at loud at a book for a while like that. I have always love Barry's stuff. This was a "novella" - which I am sure will get turned into a movie soon. I will rush to see it.

MOST DISAPPOINTING BOOKS
The Book of Fate by Brad Meltzer: I am being kind of harsh on this book. It is the latest to try to capitalize on the DaVinci Code craziness. There were some cool sections, and I loved sitting there they whole time knowing every location - since it was set in West Palm Beach, FL. I kept going, "I know where that cemetery is. I remember that quote. That is right by my old house." What really bugged me was that the book promised to be a big story of a Masonic cover up. That is what it was pushed as. That is what everything promoting it said (website, ads, cover summary). It turns out that was just a sub-story. And one that didn't make any sense. Mostly it was due to some crazy guy's delusions. So, instead of it being a real nail-biter with an edge, it was just a rather ordinary political thriller. I was really hoping that it would have the climax at the West Palm Beach Masonic Temple (instead of at Woodlawn Cemetery). I really wanted to go, "I know where that it. My grandfather used to go there." Boo.

After Greg's response, I think we'll do the last entry - movies. That is unless Greg wants to cover something else like music, politics, food. I didn't think I had enough to justify a whole entry on those areas. We could do a catch all if he wants. If not, movies will be next.